When I was a kid, I used to walk to school past a house that had one of those “invisible fences” to keep the dog in the yard.
Every day, the little doggo would run out to the edge of the property and yap at us as we walked by. Every single day.
But, no matter how much he chased us, he never tried to cross the “invisible fence”.
The way those invisible fences work is that there’s a collar that runs on batteries.
And there’s a “fence” that emits a radio frequency the collar can pick up on.
When the dog approaches the fence, it first lets off a loud sound only dogs can hear.
Then it gives a little electric shock when the dog get close to the “fence”.
The dogs very quickly learn not to even try approaching the fence.
It’s called “learned helplessness”.
It works on the same principle as this image.
A big ole elephant being tied up with a tiny rope.
Elephant trainers learned that if they tied up an elephant with a regular old rope while they were young, the elephant would grow up with the belief that they couldn’t break the rope.
So, they wouldn’t even try.
I wonder what would be going through that elephant’s mind.
Probably it would feel like you want to move, but can’t. Like he wants to take action but something inside him is holding him back.
It would feel like wanting to break the rope, but also being too scared to do it.
Now, here’s a question.
Could it be, just maybe, that you have a few “invisible fences” of your own?
A few ropes you could probably break, but you don’t?
Think about it….
The coaching I give isn’t about giving guys lines or gimmicks to trick women into conversation.
It’s about learning how to break through the invisible barriers that hold you back from being a better, more charismatic, more charming person.
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